Monday, 18 June 2012

Evil temptations

Easing into week 3 of the challenge now and cracks are starting to show. I thought the first week and a half were a breeze, I was eating well, working out every day, lost 2.4kg and my skin had started to clear up, I was feeling STRONG!! But the I met with an amazing bunch of 12WBT girls for coffee, and had an amazing time, but I also gave into having a piece of cheesecake - excuse there? It was mostly for Miss 3, yet I ended up eating most of it. Whilst I did learn that day that it's OK to have a treat now and again (a very indulgent one at that!!), I wasn't yet strong enough to be able to handle one, and that's where I began to slip in Week 2.

Week 2 saw me having a croissant for breakfast 2 days in a row, having meals late/skipping meals, missing a workout mid week and just basically feeling bloated and somewhat disheartened. Though despite all of this I did still manage to lose 1.7kg. Lost some cms of my chest and waist, though brought down by the fact that I lost nothing off my thighs. It brought to my attention that again, I really do focus on the negative way too much ... there were many positives, yet I focus on the 'no loss here', my failures ... and that in a way scares me. I don't want to be that negative person, I want to be able to feel confident and accept both the negative and the positive and take it in my stride.

Oooh another positive - I managed TWO weeks of ZERO and I mean absolutely ZERO caffeine, no V, coffee, tea, coke (actually no soft drink at all), and no anything else that may contain caffeine. The biggest one for me in that list is V though. Pre the program I was drinking 3 to 5 of the 500ml cans PER DAY! That's about 300g of sugar!!! Definitely not good, and I don't think it was making me feel great either, as I wasn't drinking any water at all. For the past 2 weeks, all I have drunk is water, water and more water, and then some milk or Jarrah hot chocolate. I had tried to go cold turkey off V before, but was plagued with horrible headaches, and an inability to concentrate at work, so lwo and behold I began drinking it again more than ever. This time though I think because I am eating well and exercising, I haven't had a single headache.

Today I figured I'd been doing so well with no caffeine, I'd treat myself to a small can of V. And I am actually quite proud to say, that as I opened it an had a sip, I found I actually had no desire to keep drinking it, or at least scull it down like I used to. Where once a 250ml can would be gone in less than a minute, it took me about 20-30mins to finish. I was able to enjoy it and didn't feel like I wanted more. So I think I have completed a milestone for me there and have beaten my addiction.

Bootcamp last Saturday just gone with the girls was fun, and I can't wait to do it again this Saturday! It definitely helps having that support group there, with those that have been where I am, and understand what kind of mindspace I can get into. It makes me more determined to continue and finish my journey. I am working on getting stricter again on my food intake and exercise, so that I will succeed and not set my self up for failure.

In saying that ... it's now workout time!

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