What the hell happened?

Well where the hell did all that motivation and what not go from my last few posts when I joined for Round 3 of the 12wbt in 2011? I know I fell off the rails BIG time!!! I think I just became so overwhelmed with work, and home life that I just let it all go. It's a bad excuse I know!!

So what brought me back this year to Round 2?? Well,
1. I'm 2kg heavier than what I was when I started in Round 3 last year, so now sitting @ 107kg, now officially my heaviest weight yet.

2. I had a friend post on facebook asking if the Michelle Bridges 12WBT was worth it, and well I told her it was, even though I never followed through with it and told her to join, yet I didn't myself.

3. Over the weeks I kept pondering and JFDI kept popping up in my head, yet still I procrastinated, then I kept hearing Michelle's voice on the radio say "Change your life forever, now! Just F***ing Do It! What are you waiting for?!" and I thought well it must be a sign! And well What was I waiting for? The weight to magically disappear and be thin and pretty overnight? Yeah only in my dreams!!!

So here I am, with the support of my fiancee (who is doing it with me, although not officially signed up) and going to give it my all. I think my mindset is better this time, I still have the lessons I learned last time in my head and now I am going to build on those and make them STICK!!!!!

I am sick and tired of being depressed and trying to hide. I want to be the confident happy person that I was 5 years ago. I realised today I haven't changed my facebook cover photo in 5 years. That's a long time. In that picture I am approximately 35kg lighter than what I am now. I came to the realisation that it shows how ashamed I am of myself, to show the world who I am now, I don't WANT the world to see me as I am now, I HATE HATE HATE me.

So here's to JFDI and to a NEW me, that WILL succeed at ALL costs!!!